Listen…

That right there is a true statement. I wish everyone could love themselves. It would be a completely different world tho. I think it’s sad that so many people spend their lives worrying about what they aren’t rather than living who they are. Changing my outlook to one of universal gratitude has really opened my eyes. It’s hard to watch someone systematically hate themselves on a consistent basis. But you can’t force change. I’ve tried plenty. I’ve pleaded and reasoned, yelled and bargained, given up and moved on. I was raised to never give up on people, but at some point you have to put your own mental health first. And that doesn’t make you selfish. Just like it doesn’t make you wrong for growing as a person, even when you are not growing the way they thought you would. Or the way YOU thought you would.

I am letting go of what “normal” looks like. How am I supposed to know when I’m done healing, growing, changing? I mean, I feel like this me is the me-est I have ever me’d before. And it certainly doesn’t look like what I thought it would a couple decades ago. So am I close to “done”? And what the hell will THAT look like?!?

I’m guessing that I’ll never be done because I never want to stop growing and learning, which will inevitably keep changing me.

I like the sound of that.

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