Dress Code.

A few years ago I quit wearing high heels.  In the time since, I’ve let go of all but one pair for formal events.  It was one of the best decisions I’ve made and it happened because I’m a clumsy bitch who broke the same pinky toes THREE times in one summer.  Now technically speaking  I CAN wear heels, but my foot aches for DAYS.  It’s just not worth it.  I know that doesn’t seem like such a big deal, but in today’s society it kinda is.  We put so much emphasis on how women look, what we wear, blah blah blah—-honestly, I’m over it.  I’m 40 and I’ve run out of social fucks to give concerning my wardrobe, I wear what is comfortable and what I like.  I always have.  I got endless shit from the “popular girls” in HS about what I would wear because it was “weird”.  I had this great pair of Sam and Libby high heeled sneakers with the thick heel, similar to this but blue….


(how fucking adorable are they, right?!?!!).  I only wore them to school once and between Sara and Janine’s relentless commentary on them, they never saw the halls of my HS again.  Granted, I’m friendly with those pple now in the FB universe, but I have no problem calling them out on making my life  less than pleasant back then.  Sorry ladies, but you were bitches who treated me like dirt,  I hope you teach your daughters to do better.

Right, so my fashion choices are eccentric.  Moving on….

For the last few months I’ve been reading more and more about ways to help my back and shoulder pain….and the most articles talked about all the ways that bras can ruin your body(paraphrasing of course).  I thought I’d give it a try, my current summer wardrobe is such that most times you can’t even tell, but sometimes you can.  And it’s not like I’d NEVER gone bra-less before…it was something that was pretty frequent, so now I was just making it a daily practice.

It was a struggle at first because OMG NO BRA!  That goes against everything I was taught.  The first week was hard because I was self-conscious about it.  The second week my shoulders stopped aching.  By the 3rd week my back pain was pretty much gone. SOLD!  I’m now an eccentric older gal with no bra.  I do not have a problem with this.  Do people look at my chest more, yeah–but I’ve always had a decent rack, so it’s not like that had never happened before.  I see disdain in some women’s reactions, while others look almost jealous, and then people like me who give me a solid “you go girl, do your thing”.

Today I was told that I “HAVE” to start wearing a bra at work because I’m too distracting.  NO, not a supervisor, but a coworker and friend.   I believe “HahahahahaNO.” was what I started with.   He kept using the word distracting, and I kept saying “well then don’t fucking look”.  Perhaps it’s not proper to go braless when you aren’t an A cup,  but—and I bet you know what I’m going to say—I really have zero fucks to give about it.  If  it’s chilly, I’m not sorry if my headlights distract you, those are YOUR issues, not mine.

What is the point of all this?  That now more than ever we need to be reminded that it’s ok to be who we are.  That people will judge us for just about everything we put on or do to our bodies, and those are THEIR issues to handle, not ours.  I’m not ashamed of my boobs, my boobs are awesome.  So’s my rear.  And my smile.  I will take care of my body how I see fit and if not wearing a bra helps my back, then I’m not wearing one and you can take your “suggestions” and….actually, I don’t give a fuck what you do with them.





One thought on “Dress Code.

  1. Hello, I’m Kathy Stemmer’s youngest daughter Kayla and I read your blog often and just want to say people are *SHOCKED* when I say I NEVER wear bras and haven’t for years. They aren’t comfortable! They’re confounded by my confidence. Pretty hilarious 🤗

    Liked by 1 person

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