Outrage, Fear, and Being a Lady.

I’m not holding back in this one, so there will be language and phrases that will probable offend you, but to be honest, at this point in time, I have zero fucks to give about that……just thought you deserved a warning.

First off…..it’s 2019. We should have jetpacks by now! Instead we are talking about something that we thought our mothers/grandmothers/greatgrandmothers had already settled. I never thought that my body would be treated like property of the state.

I figured rather than re-posting all the things that are going on today that are FUCKING INSANE, it was time for me to write about it because it has been directly affecting me every single day.

I was raised to be a feminist—for me that means I was raised to think that I have exactly the same rights as anyone with a dick in their pants. One of the reasons my life has been so fucking extraordinary(and it has), is because it never occurs to me that I will fail. I might be a woman, but if I make up my mind to do something, I feel sorry for you if you’re in my way. It’s not that I think women are better than men, it’s that I think we all have the same amazing potential, but I will have no problem calling out people who try to keep women dumb and poor.

Right now I am having a very difficult time having much respect for old white men. And men in general, if I’m being honest. Not ALL men—but the ones who think that they can control and regulate my body. And not just my body, but ANY lady. The truth is that as far as “being a lady” goes, the government gives zero fucks about me because I’ve had my tubes ties. If anything—having my tubes tied puts me in a whole different “lady binder”—as in it’s the lady binder of people who don’t matter because they can’t reproduce anymore. Ask Mitt Romney to check his Binders of Women!

When I was younger with working equipment, I had one miscarriage in college that I never told anyone but my fiance and my yaya about. Then a decade or so later I had two kids. I’ve never had an abortion, but that doesn’t mean I can’t advocate for those who have. I know women who have–sometimes by choice, but more often than not due to medical necessity. All of the women I know who have miscarried–ESP if it’s in the 12-16wk range–were devastated. The simple fact is that not every pregnancy will be perfect, and for our government to even THINK about charging a grieving mother with murder for her unborn baby that she miscarried…..well, that’s about the least Christian thing I can think of.

And for the love of God—if I hear one more old white man say the phrase “consensual rape”…..I might actually lose my shit. Rape is not consensual. Ever. On this, I know plenty because it’s happened to me on more that one occasion. You don’t need details—what I was wearing didn’t matter, or if I was drinking, the simple fact is that my attacker was stronger and I knew enough to just not fight and go to my happy place until it was done. No, I don’t often talk about it because I stopped letting myself just be a victim a long long time ago. I owned it, I dealt with it, I moved on.

I know that over and over in the last few months I have mentioned that underlying feeling in the US of just not being safe–and the thought of “consensual rape” just heaps another pile of shit onto the reasons that a lady might not feel safe on a day to day basis.

Yes, the current socio-politico climate has me climbing the walls because I work for a news station and it is in my face 40hrs a week. This job has changed me in ways I never anticipated. I hear you—those who say “well then you need to find a new job”. WHY? I’ve been here 18yrs, I have great benefits, and a true work family…..if I’m getting a new job, I’m leaving TV–and that’s not on my agenda right now. So as my hubs likes to tell me “You need to figure out how to deal with hearing that shit 40hrs/wk.”

Shit, I lost my train of thought…..OH! RIGHT—-at the end of the day, I think that if men think they can control our bodies than maybe mandatory vasectomies for anyone who commits any sexually related crime—-and none of that three strikes bullshit…..no, if you’re some privileged BRO at a college and decide to rape a girl by the dumpster and get busted…….snip snip motherfucker! Perhaps if the MEN had consequences for that kind of behavior than it might give them pause. Maybe not. I’m no fucking expert.

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